Reflecting back on 2015, it was quite the ride. Kind of like a roller coaster ride for me.
There are always up’s and down’s to every roller coaster ride. This is the pure joy and thrill of roller coasters. At least it is for me. The gut lurching drops drives out my fears. The heart-wrenching rolls confuses my sense of gravity. The stressful anticipation of another fast rise makes me laugh to tears.
At least this is how I view roller coaster rides.
To other’s roller coaster rides are nowhere near as joyous or thrilling. Perhaps it looms over you like a tower of death. You hear the screams of people, both of fear and fun, as it rushes by you from above. You turn up your nose and have no desire to step into that chaos with the emotional turmoil of up’s and down’s guaranteed. You walk on by and continue on the dusty, monotone path in front of you. Yet… there is some sort of longing, an inkling of sorts lingering in the back of your heart and mind wondering “what if?” “What if” I had decided to step into that roller coaster car ride towards a new adventure? What would the outcome bring?
Last year was the beginning experience of my roller coaster ride towards a thrilling adventure.
Over the past few years I have begun the building process of saving money to purchase my tickets needed for this ride and after that, waited in sticky hot lines for this anticipated roller coaster. I listened intently to various people in the lines who had already enjoyed the thriller I was about to experience, gaining more information about the roller coaster I was about to embark on. I knew—to an extent—what I was getting myself into. Like all roller coaster rides, there are always up’s and down’s.
It’s also about perception. The perception I’ve had in those down moments—those terrifying and fearful moments on my new ride—have filled me now with more hope and courage for the future than expected. And oh those rise moments! Those are the one’s to be savored and enjoyed for years to come.
I’m ready to embark on another continuation of this roller coaster ride this year. A steeper one. A more challenging one. A less known one and one that has more risks to it. Yet I’m more confident about this ride than I’ve felt in years.
In all areas of my life I’ve been experiencing growth into becoming more of the woman, wife, mother, friend, writer, and leader I desire to become. It is a process. An imperfect process. Yet there is a believed hope that I can keep growing imperfectly forward into the person I’m meant to become.
Therefore my word for 2016? BECOMING.
This past year has helped me reach a point where I am not afraid anymore of BECOMING more of who I am meant to be in Christ. This affects me in all ways like I just shared.
As a woman.
As a wife.
As a mother.
As a friend.
As a writer.
As a leader.
BECOMING to me means something deeper than a motivational word to be had. It is the deeper process of understanding my identity. Who I am. Who God has made me to be: What my talents are, my gifting’s, my passions, or my goals. The person God has created me to be to serve a bigger purpose than myself.
Last year of 2015 was a big year of REFINING my character. It was a year of opening my eyes to understanding myself in ways that has developed my inner courage, opened up boldness, and inspired an outward joy of my heart. It sparked my deeper passions and brought them to the surface in a way I couldn’t ignore anymore. It gave clarity to my various roles I play out in my moment-by-messy-moment daily life. It has been a year of gaining clearer perspective and perception of things.
This year, the year of 2016, I sense God moving me into BECOMING even more of who I am meant to be in Christ. Mind you I did NOT say BECOME as that would define myself to be fully matured and grown. (Although mature and grown will never be me with my small 5’2” self. Ahem.)
But seriously, we are never done growing internally.
Therefore the process of BECOMING for me is the constant building process towards imperfect progress of the woman God desires for me to be.
This is in fact the deepest desire of my heart.
So… if you could pick just one word, what would your word be for this year? Is it a word you need more of? A word that you seek to grow into? I’d love to hear about it!